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I hope we can all work together by spreading peace in relationships and joy over the good things that have happened Coram Deo Academy this school year. To this end, I have written and sent an article to all of the faculty/staff and parents of the Carrollton school. [click for article] I could write similar articles about the Flower Mound schools, athletics and arts replete with anecdotes, letters of praise and thanks and other encouraging news. We need to concentrate on edification and use a biblical approach to improvement and resolution of difficulties. Truly, the glass is much more than half-full.
Jesus and Paul assumed that believers would have disagreements and provided simple pattern to restore or improve relationships and institutions rather than tear them down (Matt. 5:23, 24; Matt. 18-15-20; Luke 17:3,4; 2 Co. 12:20 etc). None of us is perfect. Each of us needs adjustment from time to time to grow in Christ and grow professionally to the glory of God. However, we should never engage in unedifying speech that degrades an imperfect but good work for God. Rather we should follow the biblical pattern for handling difficulties. For this to succeed each of us must refuse to listen to or make a complaint against a fellow believer without that person present. This fellow believer could be another parent, or a student, he/she could be a school secretary, a child’s teacher a coach or an administrator. Anyone with a legitimate concern must follow a biblical approach to resolution for the edification of the Christian community. The complainant should prayerfully and politely approach the fellow believer in a one on one setting to inquire as to his/her perspective on a matter of concern. Often polite communication will resolve a misunderstanding which when cleared up relieves the complaint. When a child has a complaint against another Christian a parent should listen intently to his/her child, but should not act against that teacher/parent/student etc. based solely on the child’s testimony. Verify the story by hearing the accused’s side before assuming truthfulness without treating the child or anyone else as a false witness. A child can have a stake in biasing his/her perception of a situation to work for his/her own benefit. When I was a classroom teacher, I remember repeating an adage to a parent, “I won’t believe everything your child tells me about you if you won’t believe everything your child tells you about me.” We do this in our families all the time. What father would immediately act on a child’s accusation against his/her mother without first politely verifying the story. Likewise, we should not rush to judgment against our friends, associates or even a service provider-like a Christian teacher.
I fear when we judge another quickly we adopt the conflict-based approach to complaint resolution so prevalent in the American world of commerce. For some reason we feel justified in belligerence against the person behind the customer service counter or on the phone. This ought not to be so at Wal-Mart or at a Christian school. Legitimate complaints may require corrective action. I hope that a Christian appropriately approached will not behave defensively, but responsively. If not, or if the parties differ on a matter of policy or opinion, the complainant should peacefully appeal to the next level of administration. The administrator should then moderate a meeting between he parties with the hope of peaceful resolution. This dispassionate and biblical approach of believers one to another will build community and improve the quality of education at Coram Deo Academy. The School and the families with children attending the school must view one another as on the same team. A successful team’s members work together. May the Lord help us all dwell together patiently and in unity.
Grace and Peace,
Rodney J. Marshall
Headmaster